My parents were still teenagers when they decided to hide in the shadows and do things meant for adults. I guess we know how this story goes. They became a statistic- teenage pregnancy. I am the child who came out of the consequences of their actions. As they grew up, their relationship broke apart. They both went on to find themselves different partners and got married. So I am the only child they have together......See Full Story>>.....See Full Story>>
Although my parents were separated, I had a good relationship with my dad before he passed away some years ago. By then I was in my early twenties. His youngest son at the time was barely four years old. We were all concerned about who was going to provide for these kids but my dad’s side of the family surprised us. They did well for my siblings after our dad’s passing. They are taking good care of them and put them through school. I can boldly say that the kids are doing well.
By the grace of God, my mum is still with us. Sadly though, she lost her husband two years ago. Her youngest child was three years old when it happened. In fact, all three children she had with my stepfather were too young when he passed. Their oldest child is now fourteen, followed by a seven-year-old, and their last born who turned five this year. As always, the concern was how to take care of these children. Unlike my dad’s side of the family, my mum has no one.
I am her eldest child so I felt the need to support her. I started sending money home whenever I could. However, I realized that it wasn’t enough. I was doing my best but it wouldn’t even sort out the least of her problems. So I spoke to my husband. I appealed to him to let my sister come live with us. I felt if we took her in, my mum would have one less mouth to feed. All the money she would have spent on her education would be our cost to bear. That way she would channel her little resources into taking care of my younger siblings.
Thankfully, I married a man who is not difficult. He understood the situation and agreed to let my sister come and live with us. “Thank you so much. You don’t know what this means to me,” I told him. Truly, I was grateful he was willing to do something for my family.
When my sister came to live with us, I explained the plans we had in place for her. “You will live with us till you write BECE. From there, we will take care of you through SHS.” She said she understood.
We started off on a good note, I must say. I gave birth a while before her arrival. And she was so helpful with the baby. I would go out to run errands and leave the baby with her. Because of that, I gave her a small phone to use. That way I could always call to check up on them when I am out.
Things were going well until money started disappearing from our bedroom. Sometimes it was my money. Other times it was my husband’s money. When we put our money together, everybody loses money. Now, I know my husband enough to know he is not a thief, just as he knows I wouldn’t take his money. The baby couldn’t have taken it either. That leaves my fourteen-year-old sister.
We were suspicious of her but we never caught her red-handed so we didn’t even know how to address the issue. Whenever money went missing and we asked her about it, she would deny seeing it. How do you convict someone of a crime if you don’t have an eye witness or any evidence?
This missing money issue continued until I decided to go through her phone one day. What I saw broke my heart. My little sister was sending airtime to boys. Some of the boys, she sent them money. Money that she shouldn’t have. This was all the proof we needed that indeed, she was stealing from us.
After this incident, things changed for us. We could no longer trust her. It also happened that the schools we tried to enroll her in didn’t admit her because she failed their entrance exams. Under different circumstances, we would have come up with a plan B to salvage the situation. However, after everything we saw we didn’t push hard. We just sent her back to my mother in the village for her to write her BECE over there.
Now she is done with the BECE. And my mum has been crying and pleading for her to return to us. She wants me to persuade my husband to agree to do it. I love my sister and want to help her but she broke our trust. Because of that, my husband is concerned she might do something worse, that could put us in trouble. We are both shift workers so we don’t spend a lot of time at home. A lot can happen in our absence, you know. This is our fear, me and my husband.
However, my mum won’t stop begging me. I empathise with her plight but I don’t know what to do. If I talk to my husband for us to take my sister in again, he will listen. The question is, what if she indeed does worse? Then I would have brought it upon us. Wouldn’t I have pushed my luck with my husband then? It could even create problems in my marriage. This is why I am torn between both my families. I want to help my mum but at what cost?