Someone once said, “I wish love could be as easy as playing chess.” Love is indeed not for the weak. Esther didn’t have a boyfriend, so her friend introduced her to a guy. They started a relationship. From the moment they met in person, there was no chemistry, at least from Esther’s perspective, but she continued, hoping she would grow to love him over time. However, things only got worse because she found out the guy wasn’t just stingy but also bad in bed—a combination she couldn’t tolerate......See Full Story>>.....See Full Story>>
“My friend introduced me to the guy. They were colleagues. We got talking, and on the first day of our physical meeting, I wasn’t impressed. We agreed to meet in the evening but he delayed it till night. I almost called off the meeting, but I was curious to see him in person – to see the person I had been talking to on phone for two months. Besides, if I refused to meet him, my friends would taunt me, and they would always say I am not social, and that that is why I don’t have a serious boyfriend.
“That day he did everything to impress me. I could feel how he worked hard for to me see him as perfect. He carried a perfume in a nylon – obviously he bought it on his way to smell nice.
“We started dating. I don’t like asking guys for money but I expected him to do things for me without me asking him. But no, he doesn’t give me money, not even a gift. On my birthday, he only sent me a long love message, no gift, but on his birthday, I got him a gift.
“Aside the fact that he is stingy even to himself, he is not good in bed; he is not romantic. He doesn’t know how to kiss or cuddle.
Romantic moments with him are so boring and irritating. The only thing he does very well is to call often. He knows how to call and give me attention.
“For almost a year, I have been with him he hasn’t gifted me anything and he is talking about marriage, and he is serious about it. Honestly, I don’t love him, he irritates me, too.
“Initially, when we started, I felt this way. I thought with time I would fall in love with him, that I would get to love him back, but days have passed by, and I still feel the same way. I only like him because he is the first guy to ever say he wants to marry me and is serious about it, and he looks responsible. Aside from that, I don’t feel anything for him.
“I don’t want to marry a person who is stingy and not good in bed at the same time. Where then is the compensation? I want to break up with him but my girlfriend who introduced me to him said I shouldn’t and that it would break his heart. I am afraid I may stay without a boyfriend if I lose him.”
Dear Esther, tell him now if you don’t love or have feelings for him. The longer you stay in the relationship, the more you’ll hurt him. It’s better to be honest now than later. There’s no need to pretend if you don’t love him. As for his stinginess, it might mean he doesn’t love you enough or doesn’t think you’re worth spending on. When a guy loves you, he wants to make you happy. Or maybe he’s just someone you have to push to get anything from. You need to understand the kind of person you’re dating.
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