Forget about love being in the air, weddings are in the air! Which for me, means a lot of talk among my beautiful clients about wanting to get married. And I get it. As a newlywed myself, being married is dreamy… but only if you marry the right guy for the right reasons......Read The Full Article>>.....Read The Full Article>>
Women who marry for these reasons are far more likely to divorce:
1. Your biological clock is ticking
The baby machine in you could be overheating, I get it, but there are lots of wonderful ways to fulfill the dream of having a baby, without a husband. Sure, having one would make things easier and perhaps in your mind more ideal… but trust me, having the wrong father for your child not only disservices you, it disservices your future child.
2. You hit your magic number
Whether your number is 25 or 35, you hit it, or are years passed it, you need to erase the concept of it altogether from your mind. Commitment isn’t about a timeline; it is about an experience line.
So don’t worry about algorithms that claim the perfect age to marry is 26; marry when you are ready and have found the right person who is also ready for the big responsibility of marriage, regardless of how old you are, or think you are supposed to be. Statistics from the Pew Research Center tell us that people are getting married later in life, as well as reaching key milestones later in life, so don’t worry about a specific timeline.
3. You found your dream dress
Even if on a whim one day at a bridal sample sale you bought your fairytale dress and stored it away in the attic, that is no reason to rush marriage. If you properly store it, that dress isn’t going anywhere and when you do finally slip it on, it will look even better than the day you bought it since you will be wearing the most important thing of all along with it, true love, inside and out.
Family and marriage therapist Carin Goldstein warns of brides who are more focused on wedding details than the marriage itself. “One may wonder if the wedding is really about the two of you,” explains Goldstein. “Take time to evaluate how you will now prioritize your relationships in your life so that it doesn’t become a detriment to the marriage.
4. Your current partner is the best guy you’ve dated so far
The as good as it gets syndrome usually perks up at the time when you are nearing your magic number… this is settling in its truest form. Don’t do it. A better fit for you exists, so drench yourself in self-love and go find that better puzzle piece. Loving yourself allows you to have higher self-esteem, and according to research from 2023 the higher your self-esteem, the better relationships you’ll be in.
5. You want financial security or health insurance
If you marry a man for money, his health insurance plan, etc, consider the fact that these things could evaporate at a moment’s notice. There are no guarantees that bank accounts will stay filled, or that jobs will stay secure.
A marriage built on financial dependency, materialism, lust, or any other non-solid foundation is like building a house on sand. When the wind blows, which it will, your marriage will crumble. The biggest thing a marriage needs to last? According to research, it’s trust — and international relationship coach Clayton Olson agrees.
